Intergalactic Seahorse Part 3

Intergalactic Seahorse Part 3
By Invader-Hime


Kevin Levin sat on the couch in his living room.  He was avidly watching Baby Genius presents Shakespeare’s Greatest Hits for Children when a strangely familiar voice chimed up.
“My, Look at you!  You’re big as a house!”
Kevin almost leapt out of his skin as he felt two hands pinch his cheeks.
“Verdona?  What are you doing?  Gwen’s not here!” he almost growled.
The disguised alien smiled eerily.
“I know that, Curtis,”
“Kevin,” Kevin said, rubbing his sore cheeks.
The elder being waved her hand.
“Whatever.  Gwendolyn sent me to check up on you...and my little sparkling star!”
Kevin realized she wasn’t even trying to make eye contact.  Her attention had immediately shifted from him to his swollen abdomen.
“How do you get around?  It doesn’t look like you should be able to move.  Well, that’s under evolved mammalian life forms, for you.  That totally destroys any notion of symmetry.  Luckily, the little cosmic being you’ve got brewing in your pot will make up for all your...imperfections,” she clucked.
The old woman trilled in her throat and Kevin felt the....child in his side shift itself.  He put a reassuring hand on the top of his..pouch.  He’d had thought eight months of this would have acclimated him to the concept that there was a little girl growing in a pouch in his side.  Eight Months hadn’t...it was still bizarre and alien to him.  But there was one thing he did know...his little girl didn’t like that....that...whatever it was the alien was doing.
“Don’t do that, You’re scaring her,” Kevin said sternly.
Verdona narrowed her false blue eyes.
“I suppose you know all about babies.  You first timer,”
“I know enough.  First and last.  Gwen gets the next one all to herself.  This was an accident,”
The older woman chuckled.
“Aren’t they all?”
Kevin felt irked that she had the gaul to say any such thing.
“No,  I wasn’t talking about the baby,” he said, somewhat on edge.
“Oh, calm down.  I don’t care how my squishy organic grandson-in-law got pregnant...or whatever it is you call it since, as a man, you technically can’t be pregnant.  Technically you’re just an incubator.  Gwen’s system did all the work.  Not that it matters in the long run.  All I care is that you and Gwendolyn make lots of sparkly great grandbabies for me!”
With that, she squealed and pressed her face up against the bulge in his side.  Kevin felt violated and wished she’d stop.
She didn’t.
She pulled up his two sizes too big shirt and nuzzled his side.
“Hi, Schnookums!  Great Grandma is here to see you!”  she chirped before blowing a raspberry onto Kevin’s pouch.
“Stop it!” he coughed, stifling a giggle.
“Aww...someone’s got the hormones!” Verdona chimed.
“NO!  Someone’s got the need for personal space,” Kevin growled.
The alien clucked.
“Party pooper.  You’re far too serious for your own good.  Especially given your laughter inducing situation. What subspecies hybrid are you anyway?  You’re obviously not very evolved if your kind still have pouches.  But..if my sweet little Gwen likes such a base life form, that’s her business,”
Kevin’s cheeks burned.
She was so blatantly self-centered and insulting that he could hardly stand it.
“Well, come on.  Come out and see Grandma!” Verdona turned her attention back to the unborn child.
“She’s not coming out for you or anybody.  It isn’t time yet!” Kevin said sternly, a hand on his side.
Verdona looked as if she’d been challenged to a race.
She raised an eyebrow.
“Oh...won’t she?”
“No.  If you push it, I’ll make something of it!” Kevin said, leaning forward.
Verdona laughed again.
“You?  Make something of it?  You can hardly stand up straight.  Scratch that.  You can’t stand up straight.  You aren’t doing anything.  You are going to sit on that couch until Gwen comes home and feeds you like the nice little pet you are.  Then, we’ll get your sparkly bundle to come out.  It’ll be fun,” she added dangerously.
“Look, you purple psycho, I already said she’s not coming out for you or anybody.  Not for another month!  So back off!” Kevin growled.
In the blink of an eye, the alien shed her disguise and placed an illuminated hand on Kevin’s pouch.  A wicked smile crossed her face.
“We’ll just have to see about that, won’t we?” she asked.
A jolt of purple mana shot through his system.
It was the most eerie thing Kevin had ever experienced.  He thought for sure it would be painful.  It wasn’t.  It felt invasive, revealing.  Unpleasant.  It felt as though someone else, some other life form was in his body, moving it, controlling it...searching her nervous system for just the right combination of movements.  Searching for buttons, levers and how to move them.  Then, it stopped...only to push and pull them in terrible unison...
*CLENCH*
A massive muscle spasm wrenched Kevin’s side.
He glared up with manic eyes at the energy being before him.
“You crazy bitch!  What did you do that for?  What did you do?”
“I find this whole...waiting around bit to be frightfully tedious,” Verdona said casually.
Another spasm rocked him.
Kevin pulled his emergency cellphone out of his back pocket.
“Oh, what’s wrong with you now?  Calling Mommy ‘cause it hurts?”
“No!  I’m calling Mommy Gwen because her psychopathic grandmother...urg...forcibly induced labor a whole month early!”.
Verdona looked unimpressed.
“What are you so worried about?  She’ll be fine,”
“I don’t know that!  I’ve never done this before...and hopefully I won’t ever again,” he added.
“Hey, Seahorse, everything okay?”
Gwen’s chipper voice came from the phone.
“NO EVERYTHING IS NOT OKAY!” Kevin shrieked.
“Oh.  Did Grandma Verdona get there yet?  She’ll help-”
“Help my eye!  Gwen!  She shocked me with mana and I need you home
because its time!”
“Time for what?” Gwen asked.
“You know...the time time.  The time,” Kevin mumbled, unable and unwilling to say what he meant.
There wasn’t a sound from the other end of the phone.
“Gwen?”
“I’m here.  I...I just...now?...Okay, fine.  We’ll be right over,”
“Because I said so.  Just relax until we get there,” Gwen said, somehow managing to stay cool and collected while Kevin went out of his mind.
“What am I supposed to do?  SHE’S EARLY!” he shrieked into his cell phone.
“Calm down!  I’ll be there soon!”  Gwen’s voice crackled from the other end.
“How soon is soon?  I have no idea what I’m doing!  It is all crampy and painful!”
“Didn’t you read any of the books I sent you?” Gwen asked over the phone, obviously trying to change the subject to stall for time.
“Yeah...but none of those apply to me!  I didn’t experience any of that stuff, it was all different!” he squealed.
“You mean you haven’t been lactating?” Ben’s voice chirped over the phone.
“Fuck you, Tennyson!” Kevin screamed.
A pink energy tentacle flicked the back of Kevin’s head and he yelped in surprise.
“Don’t talk to my grandbaby like that,” Verdona scolded.
“Ben, be quiet.  Kevin, baby, ignore him.  We’ll be there in five minutes,” Gwen reassured him.
“Why is Ben with you?” Kevin asked.
“Finishing up some business.  I’m coming straight there...with Ben...no arguing!” Gwen said sharply.
“’Kay...bye,” Kevin managed before hanging up and rubbing the back of his head.
A wave of cramps hit Kevin’s left side that made him bite his lip.  He was certain it didn’t hurt as much as those awkwardly read books made it out to be...but then again, none of them covered pouch bearing alien hybrids before.
He put his hands around the swollen part of his abdomen and whispered.
“Come on, honey.  Can’t you wait for Mommy to get here?  I’m no good at this!  I can’t even handle hatching ants in an ant farm,”
Fortunately, he heard the key in the door.  Gwen and Ben entered to find Kevin manic and Verdona looking pleased with herself.
“Thank God you two are here!  Look what that nut bar did to me!” Kevin insisted.
Verdona shrugged.
“Calm down, it can’t be all that bad.  Myaxx said she’d pop right out,” Ben said, leaning over the top of the couch.
He felt Kevin’s hand on his collar.
“Oh no?  You try it sometime!  You use your stinkin’ pouch to grow your baby.   You get the weird cravings for Coco Puffs with pizza sauce...and pickles..and the you watch Baby Genius videos for the sake of your offspring.  Then, you squeeze it out of a hole in your side you thought was a really thick scar.  Pop it out of that, Tennyson” Kevin ended, gasping for breath.
“I don’t have a pouch,” Ben stated quietly.
“Well, aren’t you special?  FUCK YOU THEN!” Kevin shouted.
Another tentacle flicked thwacked the back of his skull.
“Ben, stop it.  He’s going through a lot and I don’t want my baby’s first post nataI  experience to be violent and curse word laden.  Kevin, relax.  I know how to deal with you, lie down,” Gwen said.
Ben had never seen Kevin so obedient in his life.
He lay back on the couch with an abject look of horror on his face.  Beads of sweat appeared on his forehead.  Gwen leaned him back and rolled his oversized shirt up.  Ben peered over, awkwardly curious about how exactly this miracle of nature would transpire.  
Kevin’s left side was swollen in the lower abdominal area.  The dark line that all three of them had always thought was a scar was larger than usual.  The flesh seemed pulled taut, as if it were trying to pull itself open, but was unable too.  A thin, gauzy membrane was holding it shut.  There wasn’t enough “alien” in Kevin to let it do what it was supposed to without a little intervention.  It looked simple enough...but...
“Wait.  Before I do this....Kevin...let’s get married,”  Gwen said sweetly, smiling.
Kevin gagged.
“What?  Now?  The wedding is in four months!  I’m not rescheduling that damn ice swan!”
“No, silly.  We’ll do that too.  We’ll just do it here.  Just the four of us.  Grandma Verdona can be the witness,” Gwen encouraged.
“NOW?” Kevin asked, exasperated.
Gwen pursed her lips.
“Kevin Ethan Levin!  There is no way I am having my baby born outside of wedlock in this day and age!”
Ben snickered.
“Your middle name is ‘Ethan’?  That makes you...Kevin Ethan Levin...Kevin E. Levin.  That is hilarious,” he laughed.
“Yuck it up hero boy!” Kevin snarled sarcastically.
“Ben!” Gwen snapped.
Ben looked slightly disappointed, but smiled widely.
“Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today in this apartment to celebrate the joining of this intelligent, beautiful young woman to this brash, stubborn, but well meaning Intergalactic Seahorse,” he said, somehow with a straight face.
“You have got to be kidding me,” Kevin said drolly.
“In Holy Matrimony,” Ben finished.
Verdona squealed shrilly and the hairs on the back of Kevin’s neck stood on end.
“This is so romantic!” she gushed, turning around in circles.
“If anyone has any reason why these two should not be joined let them speak now or hold their peace until four months from now when we all do this again!” Ben finished.
There was a moment of silence.
Verdona giggled.
Kevin rolled his eyes.
“Gwendolyn Tennyson, do you take Kevin Ethan Levin as your Intergalactic Seahorse for as long as you both shall live, as I am quite certain no one else would...or at least until four months from now,”  Ben said smirkingly.
Gwen looked into Kevin’s eyes intensely.
“I do!” she said remarkably joyfully.
“Good.  Kevin E. Levin, do you take Gwendolyn Tennyson to be your schmoompy pumpkin until we do this again in four months?” Ben asked.
“I...I,” Kevin’s mouth went dry.
Kevin swallowed.
Everything was insane.
This wasn’t how he’d imagined his life would turn out.
This wasn’t how he’d imagined he would get married.
It certainly didn’t involve being married by Ben Tennyson in his own living room while he was playing surrogate mother to their daughter.  No.  He could easily say he had never imagined his life would take this kind of turn.  Turns.  Loop-de-loops.
But it worked.
In its own twisted way, it worked.  He was fine with that.
“I do!” he managed to spit out.  It actually sounded like something closer to “AHHHDUE!”, but everyone knew what he meant.
“There you go.  Then, by the powers vested in me by the Plumbers..I now pronounce you man and wife.  You may now kiss the bride,” he finished.
Gwen quickly leaned forward and kissed Kevin quickly.  He blinked twice when she pulled away quickly.
“Sorry, hun.  I promise a better one at the big wedding, alright?”
Gwen said, focused intensely on his side.
“Umm...sure...okay,” Kevin mumbled.
Another cramping spasm wracked his side.  He groaned, obviously sweating.
Gwen studied the tissue intensely and an idea occurred to her.
“Here, let me try something,” Gwen said.
Carefully, she angled a thin, pink beam of mana energy and split the membrane.
A gush of grey fluid poured out.  The scent of vinegar filled the air in the small apartment.
Kevin bit his fist. Ben wretched.
Gwen tentatively stuck a finger in the hole she had made.  A tiny hand latched around her finger.
Time seemed to stop.
Gwen could no longer hear or see anything.
All she felt were those fingers.
All the strangeness and insanity seemed to stop in that moment.  That tiny little hand made it all worthwhile.  It made all the looks and stares and whispers worth it.  Those little fingers proved this wasn’t all some giant cosmic joke fate had played on all of them.  The past few months had been strange, bizarre and even frightening at times...but here and now, she realized that none of it mattered.
Her face went slack and she found she could barely breathe.
There actually was a little life in there.  It wasn’t a dream.  Their baby really was in there and was about to come out.  Gwen felt Verdona’s hand on her shoulder.  The Anodite materialized some soft, pink blankets and held them out to Kevin.
“Peace Offering?” she bubbled, smiling.
Begrudgingly, he took them.  In a flash of purple, Kevin found the bundle of blankets in his arms now contained...a very tiny person.  His side was sealed back up, now a real scar.
The room fell silent.  The tiny being shifted herself slightly in her father’s large hands.
“See, I told you she was fine.  I could tell.  Anodites can tell,” Verdona smiled, her disguise suddenly back.
“Wow.  She really did pop right out...thanks to Grandma,” Ben commented ceerfully.
Kevin wasn’t listening to them.  Verdona could be juggling and Ben could be jumping through fiery hoops right now and he wouldn’t even notice.  
“She’s...she’s so tiny and perfect,” Kevin whispered lightly.
He’d be lying if he said he hadn’t had nightmares about what his child could be.  He’d been kept up at night on numerous occasions, a hand on his side, feeling the little life within and highly doubting everything was “fine” like all the scans and tests his bizarre alien caretakers were constantly performing.  But now that she was here, he couldn’t see how any of those could ever come true.  She had two arms, two legs and a little tuft of orange hair.  She was perfect.  A perfect little being right there in his hand.
“What’s her name?” Verdona asked calmly.
Gwen and Kevin exchanged glances.
“Well, we...we’re not really sure...we were still deciding,” Gwen stammered.
“I like what we talked about,” Kevin said.
“Which ones?” Gwen asked.
“Genevieve and Gwendolyn,” he said simply.
Ben raised an eyebrow at the “originality”.
Verdona squealed.
“How adorable!”
Gwen smiled.
“I like those too,” Gwen said calmly, looking relieved.
Kevin wondered if she hadn’t secretly been having the same worries he had.  He held to tiny bundle out to her.
“This is long overdue.  The next one is all yours, I swear,” he said, smiling.
With trembling hands, Gwendolyn Tennyson took her daughter into her arms and found she never wanted to let go.  She was finally holding her...they were finally together.  She hugged her close and felt the tiny child in the blanket snuggle up close to her.
“Welcome to the world, Genevieve Gwendolyn Levin.  Things are a little strange out here...but after you get used to it, you wouldn’t want to have it any other way,” Gwen said, winking.
Kevin suddenly felt nervous.
“What was that wink for?” he asked.
Gwen sat down next to him rocking the baby in her arms.
“Oh, you’ll see,” she said sweetly.

THE END